I had a nightmare a few nights ago that Christmas music was playing in my living room, and no matter how much I tried to turn it off, I couldn't.
I somehow came to the realization that the only way I could stop the creepy Christmas music was by killing the naked Cuban angel rappelling on my backyard fence.
I had been reading The Hunger Games before I went to bed. If you hadn't read it, it's about people killing each other as entertainment for rich people. It's super fun.
It got me thinking.
If I was thrown into a situation where I had to survive and kill people so they wouldn't kill me, what skill would I fall back on?
So I made a list of my best skills:
Playing the guitar.
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| Don't question why I gave myself a rockin bod and a bikini. Just go with it. |
Singing.
Figuring out what percentages are using this formula
Crying.
Drawing a stegosaurus.
Making people laugh.
Arguing.
I decided this would be my best negotiation tool in keeping myself alive. Those people may want to stab me with a spear but I think I could probably talk them out of it. Explain why they're wrong in wanting that, what led me to knowing they're wrong and I'm right, and why they should probably team up with me and tell their Grandkids about me.
